Friday, January 15, 2010

Fan unsure if yarmulke is appropriate for hat trick celebration

From the Wait 'til this Year Humor Vault

SUNRISE, Fla.--After Florida Panthers center Stephen Weiss scored his third goal of the game against the Carolina Hurricanes on Saturday (known in hockey as a hat trick), the crowd was in a frenzy and the ice was quickly covered in hats of all shapes and sizes. But in Aisle 65, Row 4, Seat 12, a confused and bewildered Jacob Milstein went back and forth in his mind as he tried to decide whether his yarmulke fit the traditional definition of "hat" and was therefore appropriate to toss onto the ice.

"I don't ... I'm not sure ... is it a hat? A cap? Is a cap a hat? Stupid hat trick," said Milstein, who explained that the complicated situation completely ruined the game for him. "I must have reached back to throw the thing at least five times. I was excited and wanted to cheer and be part of the celebration, but I was too stressed out to enjoy it. Do I have a religious duty not to throw it? Do I have a duty as a fan to throw it? But then, does it even qualify as a hat? Aaahhh!!"

Milstein said that at future games, he will leave if a player scores two goals.

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